


Returning to london

by SkeletonHypetrain



Category: The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-20
Updated: 2019-05-20
Packaged: 2020-03-08 13:53:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18895939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkeletonHypetrain/pseuds/SkeletonHypetrain
Summary: have you ever what happened to london after what happened during the sqaud saga?, the check this story! u gonna love it





	1. Prologue

Paullie was at her evil building, writing some stuff, she looked at the left, where it was the table with that photo of her dead skeleton bodyguard, she sighed, but paul appeared.  
Paul: hi paullie.  
Paullie:sup paul.  
Paul: I have something to tell ya  
Paullie: what is it  
Paul: we are going to spend the weeks at London.  
Paullie: wow, what was the last time that we visited there?  
Paul: since the hell on earth, when..those martians stayed.  
Paul: well, let’s pack our things and let’s get started!


	2. changes

So our friends: paul,Paullie,eldain and 499, arrived to London by using paullie´s teletransportation magic.  
Paul:we have arrived and..oh my god.  
Paul saw that London changed very drastically after what happened on hell on earth, city was filled with those tripods, many people were taking a selfie while posing to those ships, they sky was blue mixed with lavender.  
Paul: so, this is what happens when you fuck up a timeline.  
Then a person appeared.  
Lester: hey, are you Paullie?  
Paullie:yes.  
Lester: thank heavens,the martians popularity is going through the roof, all thanks to you!  
Paullie: but..,they wanted to stay, I didn’t asked them.  
Lester: we know that, but thanks to the support of martian technology, your great-uncle gramp and paul´s grandfather they created those centinels from the Victorian era into bigger ones, like the centinels from x-men.  
Paullie: wow,really!  
Paul:yes paullie, but the normal centinels are still working.  
Person1: yeah, even they took a break when the martians attacked, they are still working.  
Paullie: so, if there´s martian technology,there must be…  
Eldain: look!  
Then those double English bus appeared, those bus turned into a transformer like thing but with a monocle, a hat and a hipster moustache.  
Ladtimus prime: everything is all clear!, Lester.  
Lester:thanks Ladtimus prime.  
Lester looked at the mertens.  
Lester: oh I almost forgot, sorry, my name is Lester jones, monsterologist.  
Paullie:thanks.  
Ladtimus prime: oh godly heavens,look at time!, im sorry Lads, we need to pick up some tourists from the L-tour, come on, Chapformers, transform and roll out!.  
Then the chapformers go away.   
Paullie: if there´s british transformers, it should have…  
Paullie saw some helicopters bringing a giant robot.  
Paullie:phucking jaegers.

Paul: lester, we are staying here for the next weeks, we have to settle in our flats.  
Lester: I know you guys are tired, oh paullie, it seems that the martians are now fans of you, they ended like the goodpeople, but things first, please make a subsidiary of your corporations here.  
Paullie:ok.  
Lester: thank you.  
Paul: well, we need to go,bye.


	3. mooseums

Paullie woke up in her apartment that looked like the same as in her house at antcornu, she went outside and do her routine such as spending the time at Chinatown or sleeping at the benches.  
While spending at Chinatown, her phone started to rang.  
Paullie: hello?  
Paul: hi paullie, we are at the british museum, it’s been a while!  
Paullie: oh ok.  
Paul: see ya there!  
As she turned off the phone, she started to walk through the streets of this pseudo not so doomed London, she watched the sky, those giant Martian tripods almost covered the sky, like big trees, some tripods had the logo of Paullie corps on it.  
Hours later, she arrived at the museum, she looked at the building that was also surrounded by the tripods, many people started to make some photos.  
Llie walked through the stairs of the museum, also the people said hello to her, some of them saying:poor girl, maybe someone or Howard just leaked the entries.  
She saw her friends standing at the entrance.  
Paul: hi paullie  
Paullie: hi  
Paul looked at her.  
Paul: don’t worry about what happened, lets go!  
As they entered, she noticed that everything had a modern style.., llie saw the people watching some of the artifacts.  
Paul: lets visit that extraordinary section, paullie will love it.  
As they entered the section, It was filled with big skeletons, things that came from gothic novellas,etc.  
Eldain: look there´s a timeline about the league of extraordinary gentlemen!  
The group stare at the big timeline which contained some events like the extraordinary massacre, hell on earth and from duck till my immertal.  
???: look,here they are!  
They turned to see who said that, there was a group of people with lester.  
Person1: aren´t the mertens.  
Lester: and this young woman, had invaded part of the museum, known as the league´s HQ and the nautilus.  
Person2: did you let the martians invade here?  
Paullie: no, I didn’t, they wanted to stay.  
Person3: isn’t that pale creature that defeated the apeman.  
499: yes,it´s me.  
Person4: paul, tell us about this situation about this?, what if one of the league returns via dimensional necromancy?  
Paul: I don’t know.  
Person1: let´s take a photo!

After that, they went to the natural history museum, paullie really liked that place, watching every single skeleton of the prehistoric animals.  
Hours later, the crew was wondering through the streets.  
Paul: I had an idea, let’s visit my grandpa´s museum  
Paullie: do you have a museum?  
Eldain: yes, he does, it was a present from his grandpa, and don’t you remember about this  
Later on, paullie entered paul´s grandpa´s museum, llie was amazed after staring at some artifacts.  
Paul: and that´s why my grandpa destroyed the time machine.  
Paullie: hey,and how about this skeleton in this glass thing.  
Paul: that skeleton is sir Daniel fortesque, the known hero of gallowmere.  
Paullie: I remember gallowmere, I was in that metal tour in 1998, I have a shirt of that.  
Paul: my grandpa found him wondering around in 1886, he also found him going towards the time machine, so he hit him with a stick and put it where he belongs.  
Paullie:wow  
Eldain: he was also Hamilton kift´s pupil.  
Paul: yeah, he taught 3 generations of mertens.  
Paullie; maybe he was like: uhh, another mertens.  
Paul: he didn’t react like that.  
Paullie:ok  
Eldain: c´mon guys, how about going to the cafeteria.  
Paullie: I hope theres Netflix on it.  
Paul: paullie, are you okay?  
Paullie: of course I am!, I slowly recovering from that.  
Paul: im glad you said that.


	4. serpentine arisen

Paullie was walking with style through the streets listening to ``little girls ´´ from oingo boingo in her phone.  
She was recovering her ptsd about what happened(the kidnapping of strange mertens), then she went to a shop and bought a box cap´n crunch cereal and a bottle of jaggermeister.  
As she walked, she encountered paul.  
Paul: good afternoon paullie,what you got there?  
Paullie: breakfast.  
Paul: its 7:00 p.m.  
Paullie: I don’t care  
Paul: oh you, ok, do you know where are we going now?  
Paullie: I don’t know.  
Paul: its in the centre.  
Paullie: central park  
Paul: is like central.  
Paullie: im lost.  
Paul: its hyde park!, and we are near next at..oh my god  
Paullie: what is it?  
Paul: the sign…it should said hyde park, but what kind of person would change a name of a known park?!  
Paullie: maybe we should ask those guards wearing an armor that look like a 3rd generation bug type pokemon.  
Paul: ok.  
The two went towards the entrance.  
Guard1: Halt!, if you want to enter serpentine park, you must resolve this question.  
Guard2: and the question is this: what is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?  
Paul: African or European?  
Guard2: I don’t know…  
Guard1: well,well, you can pass!  
Then,they passed.  
Paullie: how do you know that?  
Paul: well, you have to know these things when you are a king, you know.  
Paullie: boom, here´s a reference.  
Paul stared at the park, it was the same.  
Paullie: paul,look!  
Paul looked what happened, there were some people wearing squirrel fursuits and some anthropomorphic hooded squirrels wearing dark-red robes, that group was holding some red and black candles.  
Paullie: gee, those squirrels just freakin evolved.  
Paul: we need to go deeper!.  
The two friends walked towards the fields of the park, but paul heard muffled rave music.  
Paul: you heard that!, it must the centre.  
And they arrived to the centre of the park, there were normal people, goodpeople, Goths, pokemon trainers, furries, homestucks, otakus and a long etc.  
The rave music was Confusion-new roder(pump panel reconstruction mix),yeah,that one from blade.  
There were stands for food,drinks, some LAN disctricts,game districts,etc.

Paul: Oh god.  
Paullie: holy shit.  
Then a wurmple appeared.  
???: you like what have I done.  
Paullie: hey, isn’t that the wurmple from our final and last adventure.  
Paul: yes, it’s the scribe.  
Scribe wurmple: on vacation,right?  
Paul: yeah,but what happened in here?  
Scribe wurmple: oh, after your friend had finally killed that bag of bones of hyde, we just invaded hyde park, and thanks to my kickstarter and change.org, we finally did it!, we change the park´s name into its original name!, if you want to see something extraordinary, we just put another statue!.  
Wurmple pointed at a statue, it was about seldain 499 striking an epic pose, and then 499 appeared.  
499: surprised?  
Paul:yeah, we´re surprised.  
499: finally, he´s gone..  
Paullie: he´s goddamn right.  
499: I miss 500, is he alright?  
Paullie looked sad, she remembered what happened in that battle against her creation, she remembered taking of the mangled body of her robot.  
Paullie: yes,he is.  
Paul: wait, there was a monument about hyde after his sacrifice to kill the martians?  
Scribe wurmple: there was.  
Paul: but I saw you tearing down that statue in the LoEG 1969 universe.  
Scribe wurmple: there was statue here too, and thanks to the change.org petition we TEAR IT DOWN, check this video.  
The wurmple pulled out a tablet and showed the video to paul, the video was about the wurple with some bug type pokemon and Enpeecees tearing down the statue.  
Paul: wowie.  
499:c´mon, we have to find eldain!.  
As they went deeper through the park, they saw eldain, who was drinking a caramel mocca.  
Eldain: hello!  
Paul: hello eldain!.  
Eldain: they turned this park into a natural habitat for the fandomians.  
Paul: gee, imagine what if hyde from the league would see this hellpark.  
Eldain: a fucking gorilla doing a massacre at a comic convention.  
Paullie: paul, look!  
Paul saw paullie, who showed to him a bulletin board that had a poster of paullie holding a microphone, the sign had a text in French that said: venez voir la comédie de paulie à l'opéra de paris !, ne laissez pas le fantôme l'attraper.  
Paullie: it’s the announcement of my stand up comedy at the opera of paris.  
Paul: you know what they said: don’t let the phantom catch you!  
Both laughed.  
Eldain: hey, wanna get some drink.  
Paul: sure.  
Paullie: I use jaggermeister to pour on my cereal.  
Paul: it has to be paullie.  
Paullie: after all, his sacrifice didn’t worth anything.


	5. discovering harrods

Paul was at st lazarus school for the young monsterhunters with his grandpa.  
Sir Paul: well grandson, how´s going?  
Paul: right, I just brought up my friends in here, just spend some vacations.  
Sir paul: that´s great., and where are they?  
Paul: paullie, eldain and 499 were at the comic store , Im gonna pick em up at 8:00 p.m  
Sir paul: alright see you soon, I hope she would visit here!.  
Hours later, paul pick her up and her friends form the comic store.  
Paul: how was the afternoon.  
Paullie: great!  
Eldain: yeah, I don’t know that paullie was good at playing Uno.  
Paullie: yes.  
Paul: hey paullie, do you want to go to harrods?  
Paullie: what´s harrods?  
Paul: you don’t know that?  
Paullie: no, they didn’t let me go.  
Paul: i´ll have to show you.  
Then, they arrived at that place.  
Paul: here we are.  
Paullie: it looks like for the reaches.  
Eldain:riches.  
Paul: are you going with us?  
Eldain:no, im gonna be with your grandpa,just like the old times.  
Paul: alright, see ya.  
As the three friends(counting 499),entered to that place, lester was also there.  
Paullie: lester, why are you here?.  
Lester: come with me.  
Paullie: paul im scared.  
Paul: don’t worry i´ll be with.  
499: me too.  
They arrived at the food hall, it was empty, people-less place, except the clerks.  
The clerks looked at her with a creepy smile.  
Clerks: hello paullie.  
Paullie: oh god, it feels like if im at white diamond´s lair.  
Lester: we were waiting for you.  
Paullie noticed a black shadow being wearing dark green clothes.  
Paullie: are you…  
Lester: yes, I am a darkling…  
Paul: holy shit.  
499: YOU WHAT!  
Lester: hold your horses, im not going to hurt her, I wanted to say thanks about what she had done long ago.  
499: ya mean when she sealed her ex.  
Lester: yes, also, now harrods is now property of paullie corps London.  
Paullie: so this is for me.  
Lester:yes.  
Paullie:well, so this is the food hall.  
Lester: we prepared of all of this for you, please take a look.  
Paullie wandered through the hall, she looked amazed at the food from the other countries, tropical fruits.  
Paullie: god, im horny and hungry at the same time, let me crave that Japanese and Indian food.  
Paullie started to eat a lot of this food like usual, she growled and screeched.  
Paullie:guys, do you have some raw meat for my 499  
Lester:I think…  
Lester saw 499 walking with a piece of meat in his mouth.  
Lester: I think yes.  
Paullie: holy shit, there´s pizza!  
Paullie ate a load of pizza and some sandwiches.  
Paullie: this is fucking great!, is this heaven?  
Lester: I think…  
Paullie was also there holding a lobster  
Paullie: what is it?  
Paul: it’s a lobster.  
Paullie: is this a lobster?  
Lester: yes, this is what the lobster rolls are made.  
Paullie: oh, that´s true.  
Then paullie took a bite of the lobster head, paul and lester looked horrified.  
Paul: paullie!  
Paullie:what, you don’t eat that with shell?  
Lester: gee, I think she likes sea food.  
Paul: she loved seafood, she really loved oysters, but one day a woman told her that oysters are an aphrodisiac and then she stopped eating sea food and also oysters.  
Lester: she doesn’t like..  
Paul: no,she doesn’t.  
Paullie: don’t make me remember that.  
Paul:*sigh*, if you excuse me, im gonna make a call.  
Lester: see ya, well paullie, now…  
Then paullie´s head turned 360 degrees.  
Paullie:CAKE.  
Lester: oh, the cakes.  
Paullie: there´s fucking cupcakes.  
Lester: and brownies.  
Paullie: holy sheet, can I have the unicorn cake and some red velvet cupcakes.  
Lester:yes you can!  
Paullie:yeah, c´mon 499  
Then paullie took a slice of the unicorn cake also known as the unicorn obsessed 12 yr pre-teen´s wet dream.  
499: can I have this cupcake?  
Paullie:yes!  
Paullie: here, have this brownie  
499: thanks!  
Lester: guys, don’t forget that we have a candy section!  
Paullie: lets a go!  
499: YAY!  
Paullie really loved the food hall, lester was shocked when he saw llie eating every jelly belly bamboozled in a row.  
Paullie: look everyone, im a walrus, arf,arf!  
499: and im the guy with glasses from mythbusters.  
Both laughed.  
They spent the day eating, then they went to the toy section, paul came to pick her.  
Paul:hi lester, did she enjoyed.  
Lester: of course,look.  
Paul saw that paullie was sleeping, hugging a big gorilla plushie and 499 was sleeping.  
Paul:aw.

That night, Paullie woke up at London´s eye, she was only one who was there, but she saw that her friends was also there.  
She stared at the city landscape filled with tripods,giant robots and kaijus.  
But she heard someone.  
Champion bond: well,well,well look who´s here: Paula ``traitor´´ Mertens!.  
Paullie: dude, are you still talking about this.  
Champion bond: yes!, and thanks to you, you just doomed the history of the league! And you just let the martians stay!.  
Paullie: bond, don’t you remember that day, we told you that we didn’t care if the martians attacked London, we didn’t give a fuck, also, I didn’t said to stay, they wanted to stay.  
And if you are asking about why I invaded the academy, that why elves do: invade, and because of the people of antcornu city.  
Champion: good heavens what´s that!  
Paullie: that´s 499.  
499: hi.  
Paullie: so, I own now the league,part of the british museum, now what?  
C.bond: you´re right, I apologize for that, but i´ll look after the league HQ.  
Paullie:ok.


	6. down to the 22nd century memory lane

Paullie woke up at one of the london´s underground´s trains.  
Paullie: gee, what a hangover..what the..  
As she went out of the train, she was in a place that I didn’t look like the underground, It looked like a mix between an old train station and a dock.  
The sky was cloudy with fog on it, she sat on one of the benches.  
She looked at the person next to her.  
Paullie: kazran?  
Kazran: oh, hello there.  
Paullie: you aren’t..  
Kazran: im still dead.  
Paullie: but if im here is because.  
Kazran: you´re between the life and the netherworld.  
Paullie: yeah, just necromancer things, so, how´s going bein dead.  
Kazran: as usual, how´s my son?  
Paullie: he´s okay Kaz, gee, he told me everything about you.  
Kazran: that sounds nice.  
Paullie: also, you accepted him as a whovian,right?  
Kazran: yes.  
Paullie: now what.  
Kazran: well, its now time to wake up.  
Suddenly paullie woke up in the middle of the street.  
Paullie: holy cannoli, what a hangover, what street im here.  
Paullie looked at the street address.  
Paullie: OH C´MON!  
Paul and his friends appeared.  
Paul: greetings,paullie.  
Paullie: WE ARE AT BITCH STREET!.  
Paul: it´s baker street.  
Paullie: SHERLOCK CAN SUCK MY DICK!.  
Eldain:wow.  
Paul: oh god, paullie´s going apeshit.  
Paullie: GOD WHY.  
Paul: relax; we can visit the Sherlock holmes museum.  
Paullie: is this my death penalty?  
Paul: no.  
Later on, the mertens visited the museum.  
Paullie: this is boring!, this is a heaven for the sherlockians!  
Paul: what,you don’t like it?.  
Eldain: remember what they have done to both of you.  
Paul: yeah, I remember that.  
Eldain: how about her?  
Paul: her case was even worse that is now in history of fandom.  
Eldain: I know that.  
499: hey, I didn’t know that this has a 22nd century section.  
Paul: really?  
As they went to the section, paul saw paullie who was watching her videoclip of ``present and future´´  
Eldain: oh.  
Paul: hehe.  
Paullie: hahahaha, yeah!  
Then she looked at a photo of a man.  
Paullie: WHO´S LAUGHING NOW!.  
499: so,that was the end of one of the ancient fandomians.  
Paullie: guys,look!  
Paullie pointed at a purple suit.  
Paullie: I had this ``interview with the vampire´´ costume too.  
Paul: no,it isn’t   
Paullie: then what the hell is this.  
499 looked at the photo of the man, that same photo that paullied laughed at.  
499: I remember this man.  
Paul: what do you mean?  
499: I met this man before new London got destroyed by marvin, it was paullie´s other ex.  
Paullie: what are you saying, I don’t have an ex-boyfriend, ra´s is my first boyfriend.  
499: oh, I get it, your amnesia.  
Eldain: so, you remember this guy.  
499: yeah, I remember that he was shocked after he saw my marks.  
499 showed his self-injuries at eldain.  
499: he thought I was her, but I told him that I wasn’t her, he was nice, until that day.  
Paullie: can we go now?  
Paul: yes, but, I don’t want to go to the old section, that creepy moriarty scares me.  
Eldain:yeah we should go.  
Paullie: but at least, I have recovered my ptsd of this country, thanks to you paul.  
Paul: thank you.  
Eldain: lets get some munchies.  
499: aw yeah.


	7. epilogue

Paullie was at her evil building during at stormy and rainy night, writing some stuff, she looked at the left, where it was the table with that photo of her dead skeleton bodyguard, but she realized that it was gone, then a portal appeared, it appeared a huge man wearing black clothes and a white shirt, but his skin was burnt.  
Loeg!Hyde: so, strange, we meet again.  
Paullie: oh, its you.  
LoEG!Hyde: aren´t afraid of me.  
Paullie: no, but im happy to see you again.  
LoEG!Hyde: is because I am back from the dead thanks to the dimensional necromancy.  
Paul: and?  
LoEG!Hyde looked confused.  
LoEG!Hyde: why did I miss?  
Paullie: well, I have some good news for you: I own the league!  
LoEG!Hyde: YOU WHAT.  
Paullie: yes!, now I own part of the HQ, oh, and remember that park with your name on it because you sacrified your life to beat those martians?, they change the name to its original name and they turned the park into a home for homestucks,furries,otakus,homestucks,etc. Y´know it was like if Woodstock had a baby with comic con, and your statue of your sacrifice is now tore down, if you are asking about the martians, they stayed and thanks to them, the city has now transformers and jaegers, in conclusion: your London is now fucked up, I have a subsidiary in that city.  
LoEG!Hyde: nonono, this can not be happening.  
Paullie: of course, it´s happening!, look at you, hunk, after all, this line of this song fits in you perfectly: all my friend are dead, push me to the edge, by the way, im so happy that you came back, now I can have my bodyguard again!, can you run that by me again?  
LoEG!Hyde: then read my lips, forget it.  
Paullie: aren´t we forgetting one eansy teensy ever so crucial detail,I OWN YOU!  
LoEG!Hyde: what?  
Paullie: yes, it´s free real state, don’t make me sent you to the basement.  
Hours later, Paul was walking through the halls, he saw paullie comforting LoEG!hyde.  
Paul: why is buff red skull here?  
Paullie: dimensional necromancy.  
Paul:ok.  
Then paul go away.

The end.


End file.
